doubts and wish

A smile was plastered on my face. It was so fake, even I was not fully convinced but the person sitting infron of me was completely oblivious. He was talking in a rhythm and in my mind I was screaming "STOP STOP STOP .. "

He was verbally bulldozing every single good feeling I had for him. Funnily enough, he had no idea because the conversation was not at all about me or us. I was still 'his friend' and he was 'sharing' his concerns with me. This conversation alone told me how little he had managed to climb on the intelligence ladder. I, once, under the spell of the enchanted surroundings, thought highly of him.

Well in my defense, everything was Hollywood RomCom perfect! It wasn't his doing, he was just nature's pawn. It was all because of my wish. A wish had come true.

But me being a human (duh!) ofcourse fell for the invisble trap right in the middle of my magic story! Why can't we humans keep our damn emotions under control? 

"................... ofcourse I didn't sleep with her but we fooled around and it was fun...." he rambled on. It was probably 5th girl that he was mentioning. I had absolutely no problem with it all. It wasn't jealousy, trust me. It was disappointment. We already talked about the people we were both in love with in real worlds. We talked about our real lives when we were in that magic bubble. 

I respected his feelings for another person right in the middle of stumbling into something that looked alot like love! Listening to him crying over his love and cheating on her in one sentence was making me nauseous. I could feel the charm of the past wearing off of him. He was beginning to look very very ordinary by each second and I so desperately wanted it to stop. He was a reminder of my timeout from this rough, ugly and cruel world; he was the last memory of the charm that I had left behind; He was an aide- memoire of my personal miracle! 

His lips were still moving but I was unable to hear his voice. I guess I didnt want to hear another word from him. I wanted to leave before he could destroy it all.. I abrubtly stood up, confusion spread across his face and he gapped at me.. 

I looked at him.. hard ..one last time.. I tried to remember what I saw in him. I tried to look for the twinkle in his eye, the shyness in his smile, the lashes I once so badly wanted to touch, the blush that spread across his face - or may be it never happened.. May be I made it all up. May be it was my mind's animation. 

I wanted to cry but all of a sudden I was not sure why.. Instead of him, I looked across and saw my reflection in the glass staring back at me.. Did it even happen? Did I really spend some magical moments.. 

Suddenly there was a gush of wind and I was surrounded with doubt... and then everything blurred.