Tatiana

It was actually the light in her eyes that went out which threw the world into deeper darkness and made the sky shower more tears than it originally intended. It was her heartbreak that the world heard as thunder… such immense was her heartbreak and the lightning bolt? It was the shock that shook her whole self… such was the catastrophe that hit her. Surprisingly she stood on her feet, rooted to the ground and people around her were blind towards her which was not entirely their fault. There was an earthquake inside her.  Her world came crumbling down in a matter of seconds and yet she lived and worse ... laughed!

‘How do you do that Tatiana?’ She asked herself once she was alone in her room, away from everyone. ‘it’s killing me.. Oh Lord, its killing me!’ she replied.. crying hard.. so hard that her whole body shook and her heart.. it seemed like it would burst within her chest  for the pain was too much and she had a fragile heart..

If you knew Tatiana, probably you would cry too. She seemed so knock out hard and arrogant at first but once you looked closely she was, well delicate… have you ever seen an oyster? Tatiana was an oyster… if you succeed in cracking her open, you would find a pearl inside.  Always!  That tiny sparkling pearl was her soul.

She made me realize that the world is more than people crowding together, stepping on each other to move ahead, making money and getting richer than before every day. She made me see the world with novice eyes and now that I have seen it, I realize how unfortunate it is for Tatiana to actually live here. She was created with love… while all the people had histone protein wrapped around their DNA, she had strands of love that completed her chemistry.  What a pity!

She was everything but lucky, I must say.  All around her, she would try to pass on good but people had nothing good to exchange with her. They gave her , their bad.. and she gave them, her good..

‘why do you do this?” angry at the world, she asked herself. 

“I don’t know any other way of living. “ She stated rather helplessly.

She had met the wrong sorts all her life but there was one particular person who was the last nail in the coffin.  From the moment she met her till the time when he broke her heart, Tatiana felt him like she hadn’t felt anyone before. She seemed to hold his hand telepathically. It was magic to her and she made that very ordinary person so special. I often thought that he is one hell of a lucky guy to get all this from Tatiana.  Sitting outside a coffee shop in the Milan, Tatiana was talking about that stranger.

“ Do you know what colour are his eyes?”

I didn’t know of course so I shook my head in no.

‘See that golden sun rays that are coming out from behind that dense white cloud in sky?  His eyes shine like that… ‘

I laughed ‘Really Tatiana? Tell me more.”

She smiled at me and said in her thick French accent “You don’t believe me, do you?”

“He is the song of phoenix. Have you ever heard a phoenix sing?” she asked me.

“No and phoenix don’t exist “

“I used to think the same until I met him. All the magic in the books exists…  The fairy tales are not just stories… they happen… just like he happened. He came right out of a fairytale.”  She smiled faintly and then frowned a little “And by the way phoenixes exist and they sing too. “

Her version of love was so different, so bookish. She looked like a book character at that moment that had accidently stepped into our world. “Alice in wonderland”

This happened several months ago. I lost contact with her and then last week, I called her but there was no answer. I tried her office.

“Tatiana? Yea she left.”

“where? When is she coming back?”

“sorry .no idea”

And just now, before I started writing this, the door bell rang.  I don’t remember exactly when the last time I had received a letter was.  But of course if Tatiana wanted to get in touch, she wouldn't choose any other way than letter.

“See I was right. He was straight out a fairy tale. He was the big bad wolf and I was the red riding hood."

I don’t know where she went. There wass no address on the envelope.  I had this empty feeling settling in my stomach. Her pretty face flashed in front of my eyes and felt a sting my eyes and inside my head, I said : “Here goes one more Tatiana!”